Things I hate about myself.. I'm sorry, this list had to be done

1. Okay, first off.. I hate myself because I'm making this retarded list. This means there is obviously a lot of stuff I hate abougt myself (yay)
2. I hate myself because sometimes I'm being a bitch and I don't even notice untill the person is already pissed off and hates me.
3. Oh, I do this thing where I'll be talking like I know stuff, but I really don't.. and I'm just bull shitting and I know the person knows I'm bullshitting but I keep doing it, man I hate that..
4. I have no money saved in my bank account, maybe like 22 dollars, yeah.. Great college fund, huh?.
5. I always just want, want, want. If I don't get it, I'm a bitch and then come here and complain about it.
6. I didn't get a 30 or up on my ACT so no doubt I'm going to have to take it at least 5 more times and it costs like 30 dollars each time.. =(
7. I don't have a 4.0 or a good sob story so I'm not gonna get any good scholarships, and I don't have a college fund saved up (man, my mom better win the lottery..)
8. I have at least 20 people that I don't even know that talk about me and say that I'm a bitch to people like Jenna.
9. I wanted to play quads in band but Jamie Miller and Alicia Hall got them over me, WTF???? It's not like I've been begging for them since I was a freshman, nooooo.
10. After Brian and I broke up I had this 7th grader spree and dated like 4 guys within one month. Yeah, I'm a loser, so crucify me.
11. I HAVE NO MONEY
12. God didn't give me any good gifts, he gave me the ability to hurdle and run decently fast but you know what...He didn't give me what mattered, a nice, large rack. Yes, I have no boobs and I'm never gonna get laid in college. (Jimmy, I'm just joking I wasn't thinking about getting laid) My point is, my boobs are so small they don't have any cute bras for me to buy in Victoria's Secret let alone any bras. Are you with me, Rachel??
13. I'm not even beautiful, So 1, God gave me boobs smaller than my boyfriends 12 year old sister and he gave me acne. THANKS GOD! THANKS
14. Guess what? I weigh more than my 43 year old mom.. WHO HAS HAD 3 KIDS. I hope I get that lucky, this is all if I don't die during childbirth.
15. I hate myself for being depressed.
16. EFFING PMS AND EFFING CRAMPS. AND BOYS NOT UNDERSTANDING THE INFINITE AMOUNT OF PAIN. I'd like to see you guys survive with this feeling that your penis is being stretched to 10 times its size for A WHOLE WEEK STRAIGHT, NONSTOP. That's at least what my cramps feel like..
17. I hate myself for all these things that I've done.
18. I'm by no means popular, I'm a friggin' outcast, and I swear I didn't even smell in middle school. WHERE DID I GO WRONG?
19. In 8th grade track, I was .2 seconds from the record in the 100m Hurdles.. Do you know how much that burns in my heart to this day?
20. I'm meaner to the people that love me than I am to the ones that hate me.
21. I complain sooooo much.. I mean, like every word that comes out of my mouth is like either a complaint or something stupid..
22. I am so darn selfish. A while back my dad was talking about moving to Dayton and I said I didn't want to, I was called "A little selfish bitch" and I guess he was right. Very, Very Right.
23. I get so hungry I can't even eat.. but I'm sooo hungry.
24. I'm too picky to eat anything.
25. I hate myself because I've been able to come up with 24 things already, and I'm not even close to being done..
26. I hate myself because I'm so mean to my mom, and she does my laundry and the dishes, and she makes the food. WHY AM I SO MEAN?
27. I'm mean to my brother and overexagerate, and say he is worse than he is. I'm the worst older sister ever. A few years back he threw the remote at my head, and I actually threw it back, he was like 5 and I was 12 and I still threw it back. I'm such a BITCH!!
28. I hate myself because no matter how many "I love you's" and cute little "When we're married's" I get I still know he's going to dump me and we won't get married because I freak out on him every other second. Let me reiterate, I'M A BITCH. But boy, I do wanna marry this boy.
29. I'm in Advanced Select choir, but I don't sing really well, I suck.
30. I've cut myself before, and I hate myself for it. I'm a little self-mutilator. I'm going to hell...
31. I want to be a good Christian but I still haven't acted on it yet by going to church..
32. I'm the youngest person in my grade and I do a lot of school stuffs. This results in me needing to bum rides off of anybody and everybody.
33. I'm an avid shopper and I have no money, therefor making things much much worse.
34. I definetely hate how when I get mad I have to throw the thing in my hand or whatever my hand can get to first that isn't too expensive. Things like my cell phone (BIIIIG MISTAKE) I'm gonna end up breaking this new one too...
35. I'm on 35 and still going strong.
36. I work at the Dairy because no other place that pays more would hire me..
37. My hair always looks like shit, and by shit I mean my hair is brown and frizzy and won't stay straight like I wish it would...
38. So far I've only been able to date one of my crushes out of the dozens, obviously meaning I have my hopes way to high. Like by high I mean... Top of Mt. Everest when I'm at base camp high.
39. For me being me, I set my standards way to high. I mean, I'm like a fat ugly chick only looking for attractive A&F models. I don't even know what my boyfriend is thinking, dating a bitch like me.
40. In 7th grade my Math teacher had a question on a test that said (not even kidding) "Who whines more Laura or Jordan" THANKS MR. SCHLABACH FOR MAKING ME A SOCIAL OUTCAST, THANKS AN EFFING LOT AT LEAST JORDAN IS PRETTY! YOU'RE AN EFFING TURD! I should have answered, "I hate you, you prick of a teacher.."
41. If I was any of the characters in Harry Potter, I'd either be Crabbe or Goyle because If I went to Hogwarts I'd want to be a Slytherin, and I'm ugly.. Therefor making me one of the above.
42. I'm short.
43. God gave me small boobs, acne, and ugly scarred up legs from random things.
44. I have emotional breakdowns just about every other day.
45. I have mental breakdowns just about every other month.
46. I work myself too hard, and yet I still feel like I'm a friggin' failure.
47. I hate myself because I know that you probably haven't even made it this far, and I'm glad. Save yourself, STOP READING!
48. I always bragged about having good vision, guess what! I now wear contacts because I need glasses slightly. I have a -1 prescription... meaning that I just barely needed glasses and I can get by without them... WOOT!
49. I hate myself because I want a tattoo but everybody else I know thinks it's a horrible idea and will shun me if I get one. These are of course the people that don't already shun me.
50. I'll ruin good things. Good meals, Good movies, Good dates, Good everythings. Good moments, Good Memories. Yeah, so if you have anything good to share with me, don't bother. I'll no doubt ruin that too.
51. Instead of people feeling bad that I wrote this thing the first response will be, "WHAT A FRIGGIN' WHORE, LETS STONE THEN CRUCIFY HER!". Because I do shit likes this all of the time, and it has gotten old. Yet, this stone keeps on rolling.
52. I'm such a loser, I never do stuff.. I sit at home and do nothing. Plans get canceled without a second thought.. and I've been writing this stupid post for the past hour... Yes, hour.
53. I really like getting gifts out of nowhere, but I dumped the only person that has ever just done that for me before. I mean roses, FOR NO REASON it wasn't even near a holiday, nor did he get back from a vacation! Then I dumped him.. Why don't I get stuff?!!?
54. Yeah, I've considered suicide, so condemn me you evil Jews.
55. I have like 5 people that I could really consider friends. And my definition of "friend" is a very loose definition.
56. My feelings just get in the way, WHY CAN'T I JUST LIVE A NICE, NUMB LIFE?? Free of pain and dissapointment.
57. I'm a "to the schedule" kind of person, and noone else I know is, meaning.. Life has thrown me to the rabies infested wolves. May I die an unpleasant, painfull death, AMEN
58. I'm poor and I just keep growing and that means I'll end up having to wear the same two pairs of pants that do fit over and over while making my mom do laundy every other day.
59. If I were a Jew back in Jesus' time, I'd have been crucified already.
60. I hate how I use vulgar words way too often.
61. I just want to go Canooing, and camping, to a drive-in movie theatre (which I've never been to before), and to Cedar Point, and shopping with my boyfriend this summer, IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK? I guess, so. I love LIFE.
62. I never get phone calls. Maybe my mom, but that is it. Well, unless I ask someone to call me. That's the only exception. My BAD.
63. I hate the fact that Brandon Flowers, Cillian Murphy, and Hayden Christenson are sooo gorgeous, and that I'll never get to see any of the 3 in person. Except Brandon Flowers, but that was a concert, and that doesn't even count. WHY DID LINDSAY LOHAN GET ALL OF THE FAME??
64. All of my favorite shows have gotten canceled, why can't I just like American Idol and The OC? Oh, I forgot... I haven't been brainwashed yet..
65. I'm sooo lazy, I have these books I need to return to the library, and they're still not in yet. *sigh*
66. I expect too much out of everyone and everything. Like, this is me, "Why don't you just bow at my feet already?!!?", "Why don't you work your batteryless tv remote?!?!", "I'm GOD, listen to me already!!!!!!"
67. I told myself I'd stop at 50 for the sake of you people, but I have to keep going. There I go being selfish again. I need to get this off of my chest. I'm really sorry, people.
68. I don't have photographic memory, I just got bad memory. SAHWEET!
69. I'm a little internet pirate when I should support the bands I love by just buying the CD. So far I've only done that for The Killers.. but that's because they effing rock my effing socks.
70. I have about 186 buddies on my AIM buddy-list, and only about 3 people on it will actually message me rather than me have to message them..
71. I can't sleep at night, WHY CAN'T I JUST SLEEP?? I wake up sooo tired, but I just can't sleep at night.

Okay, I'm done. I'm sorry people. I can think of more, but I just don't have the heart. I've passed beyond the "I'm so miserable I must complain" stage. I've moved onto the "I'm so miserable I'm gonna just be numb about the matter.." So, I'm done... I hope you enjoyed my list =D